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How to Handle Sibling Rivalry With Your Kids

As a parent, there are many things you’ll have to deal with. Feeding them the right diet and making sure they get the best education is near the top of the list. That’s probably why you’re keen on finding the best childcare centers in Menai. However, one of the things that parents aren’t crazy about is to deal with sibling rivalry. Unfortunately, there’s almost nothing you can do to prevent it. Children are going to disagree.

However, there are ways to handle sibling rivalry when it does crop up. In this post, we’ll discuss four of them.

Understand what’s causing the rivalry.

The rivalry between your children may seem like it’s caused by trivial things like toys and screen time. However, scientists believe that sibling rivalry is actually a fight over parental love, time, and approval. Sometimes, your child might develop some resentment toward siblings if she feels like she’s not getting enough love or attention from you.

If left unaddressed, sibling rivalry can lead to many problems down the road. You must address the issues as soon as they develop. You should also remind your children that you’re a family, and no disagreements should ever change that.

Have a good relationship with each of your children.

As mentioned before, some scientists believe that most rivalries are based on parental approval. One of the most effective ways to address the problem is to give each of your kids individualized love and attention. You need to have a special relationship with each of them, apart from others.

If each child feels loved and cared for, there won’t be any need to compete for your attention. Sometimes, it’s tough to love your kids equally. There’s a strong tendency to show more love to one than to the other. However, it’s your duty to fight this tendency.

Understand both sides of the story before you decide.

When your kids do come to you with a quarrel or disagreement, you’ll have to decide or judge. It’s very important that you don’t take sides when you judge. Taking sides can increase the feeling of being unloved or unfavored in one of your children. Instead, listen to both sides of the story and try to find a reasonable compromise.

Finding a compromise doesn’t mean you shouldn’t punish. You certainly don’t want your kids to think they can get away with anything. When you’re punishing one child, it’s best to do it in private, away from the others. Otherwise, that could make the child feel hurt or insecure.

Never compare your children to each other.


One of the worst things you can do is to compare a sibling to another. Even in situations where there’s no rivalry, comparing one child to another will communicate that you don’t think the child is good enough. The tendency to compare is even stronger when one sibling does something you wish the other would mimic.

It’s much better to address them individually and explain why the behavior you desire is essential. If you’re going to reward good behavior in a sibling, make it clear that it’s not a competition, and that it doesn’t mean the other isn’t good enough. If you treat each child individually, they’ll be more motivated to behave properly, instead of competing with each other.

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